Mixed feelings

Ingles 5.0, frances 5.0. En la lista de aprobados...
I think it makes me happy.
Or not? Should I feel anything? Except for the fact that three years were of my life were a waist of time as now the "fabulous" news makes absolutely no difference for me...
I just go on with what I have, pieces of a crumbled existence, distrust, pain and sadness.